Ian On The Red Dot

Again, dedicated to same friend. The six kinds of drunks.

1. The Horny Drunk

This one is pretty easy to spot. Usually it is a guy who tries to grinds his crotch against anything that moves. Damn irritating. Thinks he is charming the ladies. He isn’t. Hands like octopus.

Rare occasions we get a girl like this. We hope for such occasions. She will dance wildly on the floor. Watch the wolves descend upon her. Not a pretty sight.

2. The Sleepy Drunk

The kind that just rests at some corner or on some friend’s lap. Kills the night for at least one person.

Famous words from such drunks:

“Is it time to go yet?”

3. The Laughing Drunk

The kind that laughs at anything and everything. Person pukes. Laughs. People Fight. Laughs. If girl, makes every guy feels like a stud because they think they are bloody witty. Can get extremely irritating if she cackles. Can be cute if she giggles.

If it is a guy, we just think he is retarded.

4. The Hyper Drunk

The energizer bunny of the group. Bouncing here, and there, and everywhere, we are the Gummi bears.

We always wait for such drunks to think they can dance and jump onto the platform. If only there was better lighting for the videos soon to be posted on YouTube.

5. The Angry Drunk

The most dangerous kind of drunk to be around. Belligerent. Friends have to keep watch on person and make sure nothing violent happens.

Famous words:

“CB. You stare what stare. Want to fight is it. CB”

6. The Melancholic and sometimes Philosophical Drunk

If guy, can be extremely sexy to some girls. Will just sit there and look melancholic. If musically inclined and if in right location, guy will whip out guitar and start playing songs. Girls will swoon.

If girl, guys get chance to show sensitive side by listening. Chance to put arm around shoulder and give gentle squeeze and stroke hair. Use chance wisely.

Famous words:

“Why are we here. Sigh. What’s the point of life. Sigh. Why love? Sigh.”

So, which kind are you? I’m three of them.

Dedicated to a friend. wink. Below are some quotes about the awesome thing we call beer or as I would call it - the thing that makes everyone beautiful.

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
Stephen Wright

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
Benjamin Franklin

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
Dave Barry

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.
Dave Barry

Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn’t drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, “It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver.”
Jack Handy

“When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.”
Henny Youngman

“When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let’s all get drunk and go to heaven!”
Brian O’Rourke

To some it’s a six-pack, to me it’s a Support Group. Salvation in a can!

And my personal anecdote about beer:

Me: Bro, I cannot drink anymore.

Second Bro: 4th Brother (me), look at this girl (one of our friends). Is she hot to you?

Me: Normal loh.

Second Bro: You haven’t drank enough. When she is hot, you can stop.

A friend shared on Facebook about this event which is pretty interesting.  Note, you would have to log into Facebook to get the event page.

A description of the event:

Well…it’s very simple! We just wear a really loud bright colored t-shirt and board on the MRT (Singapore train service)! Starting off at Boonlay station, we stop and get off at every MRT station to buy cheap drinks. Be it a pub, coffeeshop, supermarket, or even a 7-11, we grab whatever we can and down as many drinks as possible. Why pay for expensive drinks at clubs when we can get them at cost price outside? The last stop will be at city hall in which we’ll go to a club of choice. Having built up a party momentum, we’ll party the night off with a blast! Its something like a drinking marathon + a tour around Singapore + pre party drinking + Valentine’s day celebration all combined into one!

The event reminds me of events that have been organized by lori kufner and kevin bracken of Newmindspace in Toronto and New York.

What does Newmindspace do?

Newmindspace is interactive public art, creative cultural interventions and urban bliss dissemination based in New York and Toronto.

One of our goals at Newmindspace is to make these unique happenings in public space become a significant part of popular culture, partially replacing passive, non-social, branded consumption experiences like watching television.

Newmindspace is committed to reclaiming public space, inventing new ways of having fun, and creating community.