Ian On The Red Dot

Jen Kwok sings about dating an Asian

Hey there, my name is Jen Kwok
And I’m here to tell you that dating Asians rocks
They have smooth skin and silky hair
So damn exotic, got that ethnic flair
So sweet and gentle, smell so good
So freaky, nasty, do what you always wanted to
So obedient, they’ll please you like no one can
That’s right, I’m talkin bout an Asian man

Everyone should date an Asian man
Don’t gotta be serious, just f*** an Asian man
At least f*** one, at least, least f*** one
At least f*** one, at least, least f*** one

If you feel inspired by the song, and a lady …

Notes:

The brilliance of this song is not the lyrics. The lyrics are just proof of Jen Kwok’s amazing execution as a comedian. Who didn’t first think that the song was about the virtues of dating Asian women, especially from the perspective of non-Asian men. The first thought, at least mine and I dare to say for many others, betrays how we see Asian women as the only sex from the Asian ‘world’ to have any sort of social value in the Western parts of this earth.

Full lyrics:

Date an Asian
Song Lyrics by Jen Kwok
Rap Lyrics by Soce, The Elemental Wizard

Verse 1:
Hey there, my name is Jen Kwok
And I’m here to tell you that dating Asians rocks
They have smooth skin and silky hair
So damn exotic, got that ethnic flair
So sweet and gentle, smell so good
So freaky, nasty, do what you always wanted to
So obedient, they’ll please you like no one can
That’s right, I’m talkin bout an Asian man

Chorus:
Everyone should date an Asian man
Don’t gotta be serious, just f*** an Asian man
At least f*** one, at least, least f*** one
At least f*** one, at least, least f*** one

(Hey, eh)

Verse 2:
Asian men don’t whistle when you walk down the street
They’re honest dudes, honey they won’t cheat
Not sayin if he sees a hot chick, he won’t bone her
Hey, that’s why we got concubines in our culture
Some people say that I am full of bull****
Yeah I’m dating a white guy, but I ain’t no hypocrite
I’ve dated Chinese, Korean and Sri Lankan
Yeah, I’m down with the brown
Don’t even get me started

Bridge:
Where my Punjabis at?
Where my Philippinos at?
Where my bubble tea drinkers at?
Everyone should be raising their hands for that one – it’s delicious!

Chorus:
Everyone should date an Asian man
Don’t gotta be serious, just f*** an Asian man
At least f*** one, at least, least f*** one
At least f*** one, at least, least f*** one

Rap (Soce):
What’s happening? Are you Japanese? Can I have a piece
Of miso, maybe a frappochino
And speaking of Chinese, meet me at Silk Road Place please
For the open mic, plus some bubble tea
And Thai, I met a cute guy when I ordered Tom Yum
I could go there every day, feelin on his hot bum
Cultural exchange, I could teach you the Torah
Light the Menora, can I have samosa?
Rotating your medicine balls
In the palm of my hand, never lettin em fall
I hope that I look as good as Andy Lau
When I advance in age, still standing proud
And what about my Persian peeps? Certainly!
Help me to absorb the heat. You’re sure to please.
To my Patels, Kims and Wongs, my love’s quite strong
Like a Bollywood movie, we dance all night long

Chorus:
Everyone should date an Asian man
Don’t gotta be serious, just f*** an Asian man
At least f*** one, at least, least f*** one
At least f*** one, at least, least f*** one

Breakdown:
Asian men have been such an important force in my life
Like my dad
Don’t date my dad
He’s married to my mom
And, theoretically, I’m old enough to handle it if they got a divorce
But, you know, it would kinda mess with me
It would kinda mess with me, I’m not gonna lie
So just…don’t date my dad

(Don’t f*** the same one, find a different one)
I’d cut you
(That would be a gang bang)
Yeah, that’s not cool – don’t date my dad
(Unless that’s what you’re into,
I’m not here to judge,
Make it consensual)
I’m not even gonna tell you his name
So you’re not gonna be able to find him now
And therefore, you won’t be able to date him

Via Rambling Librarian:

The first encounter I had with the potential and power of telling a story backwards (or rather playing around with our understanding of the linear narrative) is Martin Amis’s novel Time’s Arrow.

Should there be an entertainment show for business?

Finance stuff isn’t a game.

Below: Jon Stewart’s Interview of Jim Cramer on ‘The Daily Show’.

Where is heaven? What is heaven? Heaven is on earth, daily created by the people who love us.

World Builder from Bruce Branit on Vimeo.

On another note, I finally appreciated the beauty of Facebook Connect in lowering, if not totally smashing, the barriers of entry to join a new site. I got a new account for Vimeo easily with Facebook Connect without any need to register and remember a new password.

Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky,
Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone,
Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,
One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them,
One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.

One Facebook account to rule them all, One Facebook account to find them,
One Facebook account to bring them all and in the darkness bind them

I should be horrified.

A friend on Facebook shared about this movie:

Haven’t watched a movie for a long time (relatively speaking). I’ll reserve my next movie-watching-dollars for this one.

I think being a Mac user for the last few years, since I bought the original iBook, has made me missed out on quite a few awesome games. Left 4 Dead looks good. Time to get a PC.

The game’s blog has an interesting post on the development of the video embedded above.

Traditional in-game training mechanics didn’t make sense for Left 4 Dead, because they would take away from the sense that players had been immediately dropped into a very real, very dire zombie apocalypse. We didn’t want a slow ramp-up in gameplay to take away from that tension. As a result, we decided that it would make sense to begin the game experience with a non-interactive introductory movie that could get players revved up and subtly cue them to important gameplay mechanics such as “light disturbs the witch” and “car alarms attract the horde.”

In an earlier post, I shared how I used iMovie to create photo slideshows for my friend’s wedding. Well, while it was a fun learning experience, I think my friend would have been better served if she had gotten a professional, however cost was a concern and I was asked to helped.

If only we had known of this company animoto.

However, while the videos do look professionally done, there is something terribly unsatisfying about using animoto to create them. Maybe it is the lack of involvement on my part.

Watch till the end of this video. Nasty.